dont cheat yourself, treat yourself!

Ladies we do so much to take care of everyone in our life, whether it is our spouse, our children, siblings, superiors, and everyone that we are willing to please. We are trying so hard to take care of everyone, that we forget to take care of ourselves. We do so much that we deserve to be rewarded. These are a few things that I do to treat myself if I need a little boost to remember that I am a special, beautiful woman.


Quiet Time:
Can be essentially important to those who have children. Whether your taking just 15 minutes or even an hour make that time devoted to you. Sit in your favorite chair and just relax, put your feet up if you want to. Or listen to your favorite "chillin" music, and sip on some tea. I find that reading allows me to relax a great deal, finding myself engrossed in someone else's life allows me to escape from a mine for a little while.


Mani/Pedi/Massages:
What is more relaxing than having a perfect stranger rub the tension away from your body? (except your man doing the rubbing). Massages are so relaxing because you get to lay down for one, and the environment they provide is so peaceful. You may have a job that puts a strain on you physically. Getting the kinks rubbed out can have you feeling rejuvenated & refreshed. If you dont have the time for a massage, stop by a local nail salon, and your either a manicure or pedicure, or be lazy like me and get both! The fact that we get beautiful nails out the deal is nothing. You get a hand massage as well. We use our hands everyday, never thinking that they need panmpering either! I LOVE LOVE LOVE getting pedicures! I get to sit in the big vibrating chair, which with the right settings feel like heaven! Soaking my feet in the warm water, and letting the feet just get rubbed, rubbed, rubbed feels so good!


Shopping:
A girl's favorite past time right? I love going shopping, being in the stores with so many store and accessories, is an instant mood boost for me. We don't have to go on a full out shopping spree, buying ten bags worth of things we'll never use or wear. If your pockets are a little empty treat your self to something simple. Stuff doesn't have to cost you a grip just to make you happy. Buying a pretty color nail polish might be just the thing to make you feel good.


So just remember, while making sure everyone else is taken care of seems to be a woman's job, we mustn't forget to take care of ourselves, because we have to take care of ourselves to feel good enough to take care of others.

Losing Feelings?

There comes a point in relationship, when a person may think their counterpart is losing feelings. Or maybe even you may be the person who is losing feelings. It is very natural for this to happen, especially if you have been in a long-term relationship. There were times that I would sit and home, and wonder "why hasn't he called me yet?" or "why is he taking so long to text me back?" There are different ways to see if he is losing feelings for you. If he is generally a cool-tempered man, or very loving towards you, and out of no where he starts acting differently. Or even rude. Do not immediately jump to conclusions. He may be stressed about work, family, or even money. True, he should not take it out on you, but that does it mean he doesn't still care for you. Simply ask him is he stressed out about anything because he has been lashing out at you lately. He may not have even realized that he has been mean to you, and may tell you what is going on in life. If he still seems to act like a fool, and you can not pinpoint a reason for the anger he may just be tired of you plain and simple. Because if you do not care for someone and they are constantly bothering you, it can get very annoying.

If you are the person that is losing the feelings, ask yourself "could i really see this going somewhere?" if the answer is no, then do not waste yours or his time, because there may be someone out there better for the both of you. Try to split amicably, and you may even to able to remain friends or at least civil. If the answer is yes, you see a future with this person, then you may want to ask yourself what is making you lose feelings? It may be habits that he has, (burping, farting, being inconsiderate..etc) ---things such as this can be worked on *IF YOU HAVE THE PATIENCE!* you can sit down and do the old fashion, make a lists of likes & dislikes about him, and if your dislikes are something that can be changed then you may still be able to save your relationship. If he has an anger problem, for example, and you have pointed it out to him, and he still has not even attempted to try to fix it then bye-bye boyfriend.

Another thing that may work for you is to take a break. An actual break not a "I dont wanna be mean and say its over but it really is" break. But an actual break where you intend on getting back together. The break should not be a free-for-all hofest. But you should take the time to reflect on your relationship, and see how life is with out. If you feel a sense of peace without him, it may be best if you part ways. However, if you missing him, and you are feeling in your heart that the break was a mistake, this may have just been the eye-opener you needed and you and your partner may just need to re-evaluate your relationship a bit.

All in all, if you truly love someone you always will until the end of time, and if you find yourself no longer loving them, truth is you never did!

The Beauty Within...

With so many different dating services, and with so many people flaunting how "in love" they are it is hard being either single or in an unhappy relationship. We women are focused on trying so hard to be who we think we should be in order to get or keep a man. What some people fail to realize is if you cannot give yourself the love and affection you desire, how in the world can you love someone else? We cannot depend on anyone to love us to make us feel good. LOVE YOURSELF! When we are in love with ourselves, no one can tell us anything. Negativity will roll off of you, because can't anyone stop your shine, but you. So what that frenemy told you she hates that dress on you? If you feel good about yourself when you look in the mirror, that kind of negativity will not cause you any harm but will boost your self confidence, because you see that people are taking time and energy our of their day to hate on you.

The media has definitely distorted our society's view on beauty, so it is now time to reinvent what society thinks, and the only way we can do that is truly believe that beauty comes in all shapes, colors, and sizes, and just because we don't look like that model on the billboard, or those heffas on the music videos does not make us any less of a woman!